March 31, 2021

Today is the finale day of March. It’s 65 F / 18.3 C, I’ve got a Yuri on ICE! blanket on my lap, it’s slightly cloudy outside, and honestly… this has been one of the most peaceful days I’ve had since the beginning of this year.

So naturally, I wanna blog about it.

March was a big transitional month for me.

I physically moved on from my very bad February. As some of you might know, February was… a long month for me. Post break-up, I ended up back in Texas, only to have to brave the Winter Storm that blew our way. After that, I tragecally lost my aunt, who died from lung cancer. I laid her to rest on March 6th of this month.

Despite all that, I’ve actually had a really active month, if I’m being honest. Truth be told, I expect this to be a really calm month. Instead, I’ve ended up with a lot more work than expect, which is a really good turn of events. In fact, I’ve gotten some new QA/Proofreading contracts, am knee-deep into working on an otome game (it’s under NDA, so no more on that) and have done a whole lot of writing over But Why Tho.

I’ve also just kicked on the Spring 2021 seasonal reviews on Anime Feminist with Koikimo, which is… something that exists. I’ll be doing the same over on But Why Tho, once the five or so shows I’ll be covering start.

In many ways, it’s been really nice working again. It’s been nice to have some control over my life. A lot of last month was spent feeling particularly out of control of my life, my autonomy, and at times, my work. Granted, a lot of what happened to me was out of control. No matter how much I planned, I still got blindsided, and ultimately, kind of had to learn how to go with the flow. Thankfully, I wasn’t alone in my struggles, which has allowed me to keep my mental health in check as I set my eyes on wrapping up a bunch of stuff in April, and picking up a few more writing gigs for the rest of the year.

While I’m still out of gainful employment (at least until July; more on that in another post) I’m making a bit more money monthly, at least for April and May. Plus, in addition to the game I’m working on, I’ll be doing some Japanese teaching on the side, and hopefully, will get regular QA projects a few times enough to start saving again.

Also, I’ll be making enough that maybe next month, or in May, I’ll be able to getmyself a brand-new Polaroid Now I-Type camera in Mint, as a treat for all my efforts this year. I’m also trying to save up for an Organelle for music-making purposes, too. It’s a frivalous thing, but… I think I’m worth a bit of frivality. I haven’t really had anything nice in a while. It would be nice to get something that’s completely mine.

All of this to say that this March really was about thriving, moreso than surviving. Ever since I left Japan last August, I’ve really… struggled to find my footing. I’m now into my ninth month of unemployement, and some days, it’s hard to imagine this ending, especially if I stay in the states. I’m also into my ninth month of being uninsured, which -knock on wood- hasn’t bitten me in the butt yet. And while my savings account has more digital spider webs than coin… somehow, some way, I’m doing the dang thing.

And I’m doing it really, really well, enough that I’m starting to feel a bit of pride in myself again.

I’m not sure what April will bring. What I can say is that I feel rather confident heading into next month. Sure, there will be moments where I don’t feel great, but by and large, my confidence has been restored, enough that I know I’ll find a way to land on my feet and still keep going. I think the mere fact that I can say that and pretty much believe it shows how far I’ve come since the beginning of this year, and since February.

Now, all I have to do… is just keep giving my best.

(Oh, yeah, remember that thing about me wanting to end the year in Japan? More on that next post.)


As always, if you like what you’ve read, like what I’ve got to say, enjoy reading my pop culture critiques and reviews on sites like But Why Tho? or Anime Feminist, or just generally want to support my on-going creative and professional endeavors as a freelancing Blerd, then please consider buying me a nice, pipping hot cup of Ko-Fi, or donating me via PayPal. You can also help me out by gifting me supplies and treats from my Amazon Wishlist. Every bit of support helps me sustainably and healthily do the work that I love.

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